Friday, November 18, 2011

Thanksgiving Jokes and Riddles

In my family, some of us save up jokes to tell at Thanksgiving dinner. Well actually, I’m the only one who does that, but I’m pretty sure the others like them! If you’re the dinner jokester in your family, here are some good ones for you.

Knock Knock Jokes
Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Norma Lee.
Norma Lee who?
Norma Lee I don't eat this much!

Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Phillip. Phillip who?
Phillip a big plate and dig in!

Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Tamara who?
Tamara we'll have turkey leftovers!

Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Dewey who?
Dewey have to wait long to eat?

Thanksgiving Riddles
What did the mama turkey say to her naughty son?
If your papa could see you now, he'd turn over in his gravy!

If April showers bring May flowers , what do May flowers bring?

If the Pilgrims were alive today, what would they be most famous for?
Their AGE

Why can't you take a turkey to church?
Because they use such fowl language

Can a turkey jump higher than the Empire State Building?
Yes - a building can't jump at all

Why did the police arrest the turkey?
They suspected it of fowl play

What kind of tan did Pilgrims get at the beach?

What is Thanksgiving for selfish people called?

What did the turkey say to the turkey hunter?
"Quack! Quack! Quack!"

What always comes at the end of Thanksgiving?
The letter "g"!

Which side of the turkey has the most feathers?
The outside!
What are the feathers on a turkey's wings called?
Turkey feathers

Why did they let the turkey join the band?
Because he had the drumsticks

What did the turkey say before it was roasted?
Boy! I'm stuffed!

What's blue and covered with feathers?
A turkey holding its breath!

What did the farmer say to the green pumpkin?
Why orange you orange?

When the Pilgrims landed, where did they stand?
On their feet!

What's the best thing to put into a pumpkin pie?
Your teeth!

Why did the Pilgrim eat a candle?
He wanted a light snack!

What kind of music did the Pilgrims listen to?
Plymouth Rock!

***Want a big challenge? Try these 17th Century riddles from the time of the Pilgrims.
 Who is he that runneth through the hedge, his house on his back?
A snail

What is ten men's length and ten men's strength and yet ten men cannot make it stand on its end?
A rope

What is it that is full all day and empty at night?

What is it that goeth about the wood and cannot get in?
The bark of a tree

I am called by the name of man, yet am as little as the mouse, when winter comes, I love to be, with my red gorget near the house.
          A bird called robin red breast (a robin)

The jokes and riddles came from these sites:

Happy Thanksgiving, Everyone!!!

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