Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Guest Post: The A-B-C’s of Children’s Media

Today's post is by Maggie Hames. Her blog, Media Darlingsis a wonderful source of ideas for using media for family fun.

The A-B-C’s of Children’s Media by Maggie Hames
Children’s media offer countless educational opportunities. As the ultimate gatekeepers of our children’s media consumption, it’s up to us to decide what we want for our children at the different stages of their lives. And media today offers you choices: from learning foreign languages, to numeracy, to learning to treat younger siblings with kindness, there are television shows, apps, and books that will support your values. If your goal is very specific, for example, if you’re interested in helping your child learn letters and phonics in the hope of leading to early literacy, you can make choices that will support this decision across a variety of media.

You may be surprised to hear that the majority of television shows for preschoolers and young school kids don’t actually address the subject of literacy head-on. Plenty of shows allude to literacy in the form of expressing a love of books or reading, but few shows actually teach the alphabet and the sound each letter makes. One of the few that does (and always has) is Sesame Street. In fact, this show does such a great job, other shows seems to avoid stressing the subject to avoid direct comparison. (I’m sure nobody wants to be known as the show not quite as effective as Sesame Street.) On Sesame Street, each episode is “brought to you by” one particular letter of the alphabet (and one numeral as well). Viewers learn to make the critical connection between letters, their sounds, and words beginning with that letter, the skills that are the first steps to literacy.

I’m very glad that Sesame Workshop and PBS have brought back the iconic seventies hit, The Electric Company. It’s the only show that explicitly covers topics essential to early readers: phonics and grammar. Like its predecessor, it teaches these skills through comic skits and music with a talented live cast. This latest incarnation of the show leans toward a hip-hop sensibility, but honestly, it’s the witty writing that makes this show a winner.

There are plenty of apps out there that support literacy for kids who can already read. One of my favorites is “Crossword by Grade” by Prachi Pimpalkhare. Several levels of difficulty—including crosswords for preschoolers with pictures instead of words—makes this a very useful app for families with preschoolers and older kids. In fact, once a child has achieved literacy, there is no limit to the apps that support literacy; but how to get there? A few of my favorite preschool apps are “First Words: Deluxe” by Learning Touch and “Interactive Alphabet” by Pi’ikea Street.

“Interactive Alphabet” introduces each letter as a toy, each letter loaded with interactivity. It encourages children to linger on each letter, learning its sound and a word or two beginning with that letter. “First Words: Deluxe” gets children spelling words by pulling letters into their correct space in a ghosted version of the word. They place an “A” over the outline of an “A,” and so on. Without realizing it, they’re spelling words. Users can adjust the difficulty level to raise this to a true spelling “bee” experience.

The usefulness of books is self-evident. If you can interest your child in a book, you’re halfway there. But how do you get a child to take those first tentative steps into actual reading? You may already know that Ted Geisel—better known as Dr. Seuss—created his famous “Cat in the Hat” book to encourage the earliest readers to take the plunge, incorporating the easiest vocabulary words in a story that has never lost its cool. Now it’s available as an app by Oceanside Media. Your children can learn to read with the same book as you did, adapted for new media, which is a fitting initiation to the most profound skill they will ever learn.

Maggie Hames is a parent and teacher and creator of the blog Media Darlings, intended to help parents navigate a media-rich world. Maggie can be found on Twitter and on Facebook. Her blog is Media Darlings.

Thanks, Maggie!

MARK YOUR CALENDAR: Next Wednesday is World Read Aloud Day. It is sponsored by LitWorld, an organization that strives to unite literacy efforts across the world.

Monday, February 27, 2012

2012 Caldecott Books

The Caldecott Medal was named in honor of nineteenth-century English illustrator Randolph Caldecott. It is awarded every year to the artist of the most distinguished American picture book for children.

This must be a really hard contest to judge. Imagine having to choose one book out of all the picture books published during an entire year! But what fun it would be to be on the panel of judges...

A Ball for Daisy by Chris Raschka
This is a wordless book about a little dog whose most prized possession, a ball, is accidently destroyed. It’s a story about loss, recovery and friendship. It’s easy to see why this book won the Caldecott Medal.

Blackoutby John Rocco
The power goes out and an urban family goes up to the roof of their apartment building to cool off. Then an impromptu block party sprouts on the street and they go down to join the fun. This graphic novel does it all right.

Grandpa Green by Lane Smith
Grandpa Green was a gardener. He created a wonderland of topiary trees (trees trimmed into fancy shapes) that shows his life as a farmboy, soldier, husband, father and grandpa. The last line tells the story, But the important stuff, the garden remembers for him. Lovely.

Me … Jane by Patrick McDonnell
As a child, Jane Goodall watched the birds and squirrels in her yard and discovered the joys and wonders of nature. This led her, as an adult, to living with and writing about chimpanzees in Africa. Jane Goodall has always been one of my heroes and this book is a complete delight.

Have fun checking out these books. They deserve to be honored. Interested in learning more about the Caldecott winner for other years? Click HERE.

Here is the free story by Bob Brooks for this week, A Pond Adventure

Friday, February 24, 2012

Online Read Aloud Sites: Part 2

Last week, I suggested 6 sites that offered read alouds. Here are 6 more!

This is an Ebookstore site but there are 6 free books to try out.

If you are a Mem Fox fan (like me!) you’ll want to check out this site. There’s lots of other information, but to find the read aloud part, click on Hear Mem Read Aloud.One drawback – you’ll have to provide your own books. This link has only Mem Fox reading, there are no illustrations. But Mem Fox’s reading is pretty great so you might want to check this out.

This site has lots of things to read and do. The Book Zone section has books both to read yourself and to have read aloud.

This is a unique site because the stories are both read aloud and signed (American Sign Language). It’s quite cool.

This site has read alouds for Arthur books, fairy tales, animal stories and more.

Smories are original stories for kids, read by kids. There are over 300 stories, all read by kids. Pretty neat.

I’d love to hear which sites you enjoyed the most. Write them in the Comments Box!

Wednesday, February 22, 2012

Guest Post: I was a Reluctant Reader

Today's Parent Post is by my friend, Martha Rodriguez. Her book, A Reel Cool Summer, is a delightful story with fun well-defined characters. When Martha wrote about being a reluctant reader on her blog, A Reel Cool SummerI knew I had to talk her into letting me use it here. Thanks, Martha!

I was a Reluctant Reader. There, I said it!
I’ve been hearing and reading quite a bit about reluctant readers lately. I've found that some of the folks talking or writing about the subject weren’t reluctant readers themselves, but have children or know others who are. I was a reluctant reader as a child so I thought I would address the topic from my perspective.

Come to think of it, I’m probably still a reluctant reader. When I buy or borrow a book you can be sure that I have researched it thoroughly before taking the plunge. I won’t just pick something up and give it a try because I know that I probably won’t get past the first few pages. This has been true for a long time.

I remember reading the Dick and Jane books as a child, but I’m not sure those books count because they were required reading in my first few years of school. And, yes, I read Dr. Seuss books and some of the other books that were popular, like Caps for Sale and the Curious George books. If my memory serves me correctly, I remember that those books were just “okay.” You’re probably upset with me right now and I’ll probably get some interesting comments for writing that.

I read those books because they were familiar and easy to read, not because I couldn’t put them down. I read them because they were always easily available in my elementary school classroom, not because I always had to have a book in hand. I read them because they were the books that the librarians propped up on the shelves, not because it was a read or die situation.

I’m not saying that they weren’t and aren’t wonderful books. They have stood the test of time and are terrific books loved by all. What I’m saying is that I was not a reader. There were a few rare occasions when I picked up a book, like Anne Frank: The Diary of a Young Girl or Helen Keller’s The Story of My Life, and read it cover to cover in one or two sittings but that was quite rare.

What was wrong with me? Nothing. Who was to blame? Not a single person.

I just preferred to play hopscotch outside with friends, play with Barbie dolls, or watch television. Some of you will recall that we used to do those things back in the dinosaur age… I mean in the 70’s. I’m sure that my parents, teachers and librarians tried everything they could to spark a love of reading in me, but it just wasn’t happening. The only time I ever thought about reading was when there was a reading assignment and a subsequent report due. My thoughts were mostly of how horrible the whole ordeal would be. What could I do about it? Nothing, just read the book and do the assignment. I disliked (we weren’t allowed to say “hated” in my family) every minute of it.

Does everyone like peas and carrots or jumping out of an airplane? No. So, is it possible that not everyone likes reading? I know, it seems weird that I’m asking that, especially because I just wrote a children’s book!

Well, the truth is that we would all be very happy if everyone liked to read but the reality is that not everyone does. Yes, reading plays a critical role in expanding vocabulary and comprehension, in unleashing imagination and creativity, and in growing curiosity in children. The problem is that it can’t be forced on someone any more than you can force a person to eat their peas and carrots (believe me, my parents tried and somehow I always found a little hiding place for them) or to jump out of an airplane (my husband would like to try to convince me but knows better).

So, what do we do? We keep trying just like my parents, teachers, and librarians did because we want to give our kids the best we can. It takes a bit of patience and some imagination to find the right fit for each child but if you can get that spark, it’s all worth it.

I’m not a teacher or a librarian and I certainly don’t play one on TV, but as a reluctant reader and the mom of a somewhat reluctant reader, let me give you some ideas that I’ve used successfully.

1. Books you enjoyed as a child: Read to your child the books you enjoyed as a child or young adult. Tell them why you liked the books, where you read them (in a fort you built in your room, for example), how you came upon the books, and who read them with you (mom, dad, grandma, grandpa).
2. Books that interest your child: Always be ready to read books that interest them, even if they don’t necessarily interest you. This one can be tough. Remember it’s not about you; it’s about your child and that spark you want to create.
3. Picture books and books with pictures: When children are very young, picture books are wonderful because, while the child may not yet be able to read, the pictures are fun for little ones to look at. They will probably memorize the story before they can read the words. Once they are able to read the story, they will enjoy the book in a completely different way. In a funny twist, small children may also like books that are not necessarily meant for children but that have colorful pictures. You can relay the information in the text by tailoring it to their comprehension level. Make up stories for the pictures until they are old enough to understand the actual text.
4. Different genre: Read all types of books with your child to find out which ones he or she likes best. If one genre isn’t appealing, try something new as long as it is age and reading level appropriate. Historical fiction, current events (even newspapers, magazines and on-line blogs or articles) and biographies may interest him or her.
5. Sports and animals: Children’s sports magazines with interviews of favorite athletes may encourage a child to read more about a particular sport or her favorite team member. Likewise, animal magazines usually feature unusual creatures and their unusual lives. It’s a fun peek into another world and a reason to find more reading material of the cool animals featured.
6. School topics: Find books or fun workbooks about topics your child likes in school like math or science. Even fun workbooks require reading comprehension, writing and focus. When the problems are fun to solve, they will most likely look for harder ones to challenge themselves. Even young children like to peek under secret flaps or follow a winding road to find their favorite characters.
7. Magic or science kits: Magic and science experiment kits are a great way to get your hands on reading and a great way to show what you can do with a magic wand or a test tube.
8. Comic books: Age appropriate comic books are fun. The pictures are detailed and engaging and allow children to escape to different worlds. It’s fun to imagine living in a strange world of superheroes with superpowers. Children may even be encouraged to write their own adventures.
9. Mad Libs: Fill-in-the-blank books like Mad Libs and others are a fun way to be silly and giggly. They won’t even know they’re reading and… added bonus, writing. They can even try to write their own fill-in-the-blank stories.
10 Board games: Play board games with age appropriate trivia questions. If your child doesn’t know the answer, it can be fun to explore on-line or at your local library for the answer or to learn more about the topic.
11 Cooking, crafting, exploring: Find cooking or craft activities to do together or go exploring in your back yard with a bug book and magnifying glass or a telescope and astronomy book.
12 Plays and movies: Buy or borrow books of plays and help the kids put on a production for family and friends or make a movie. Sometimes getting into costume can make reading fun.

Don’t stop there. Ask your child’s teacher or librarian for more ideas, be a good example by reading books for pleasure, listen carefully to your child when he tells you why he likes or dislikes certain books, and relax and let him or her take the lead from time to time. You never know… she may write a book some day!
Safety first! Parents should always supervise children when working with science kits, cooking and crafting, or when going on-line.

Here are some resources you may want to check out:
Comic books list by Imagination Soup Blog
Show Me How! by Vivian Kirkfield. With one hundred picture books, crafts and cooking ideas for young children.  Read my review here
Free movie script for elementary school children: Mama Mia Can't Believe Her Ears

Until next time… stay cool!

Thanks again, Martha - good stuff!

MARK YOUR CALENDAR: March 7th is World Read Aloud Day. It is sponsored by LitWorld, an organization that strives to unite literacy efforts across the world.

Monday, February 20, 2012

Terrific Books by Kate Klise

Kate Klise has written several books with a feature I’ve always loved: the stories are written as a series of letters. Outstanding drawings by Kate’s sister, Sarah, make the books even better. Each of the illustrated books also includes newspaper articles, advertisements and other written materials.
Not all the books are illustrated. The last 2 on my list are standard chapter books and quite wonderful.
These books are not easy readers – the reading levels are 4th to 6th grade. But they are very fun.

Dying to Meet You
 Ignatius B. Grumply writes children’s books. He can’t seem to come up with ideas for his new book so he moves into an old house at 43 Old Cemetery Road. However, the house is already occupied by 11-year-old Seymour, his cat Shadow, and an irritable ghost named Olive. I simply love this book. When you read it, be sure to say the names of the characters aloud. They’re hilarious.
The next books in the series:
Over My Dead Body
Till Death Do Us Bark
The Phantom Of The Post Office (coming soon – yay!)

Regarding the Fountain
 The Dry Creek Middle School drinking fountain has sprung a leak, so the principal writes to Flowing Waters Fountains, Etc. to request a new fountain. Fountain designer Flo Waters responds that she’d be delighted to design a custom-made fountain. She asks the 5th grade class of Mr. Sam N. (the teacher we wish we’d all have) to draw pictures of their dream fountain and send them to her. Unfortunately, this is NOT the kind of fountain the principal had in mind! Never mind, the kids and Flo Waters just ignore his complaints.
The sequels:
Regarding the sink
Regarding the trees
Regarding the bathrooms
Regarding the bees

Letters from Camp
Imagine a summer camp just for siblings who don’t get along. Camp Happy Harmony is that kind of camp. But is it? After they've been there for a while, the 6 campers think maybe not. The camp is run by the Harmony family and they are not at all a family in harmony. In fact, they’re downright mean and rather dastardly. Read to find out how the 3 sets for brothers and sisters figure out how to outwit them.

Trial by Journal
Lily Watson is in sixth grade. She's on a jury for a murder trial – all because of a new law saying a child must serve on the jury when a trial concerns a child victim. She'll be out of school for a month, so her teacher insists that she keep a journal. This book gives an inside look at a jury trial and offers a murder mystery to solve.

The following books are also by Kate Klise, with no illustrations. They are excellent middle grade chapter books.

After her brother, sister, and father die in a plane crash, Daralynn Oakland receives 237 dolls from well-wishers, resulting in her nickname: Dolly. After such a start, you’d think this would be a grim book, but it isn’t. There are terrific characters and lots of quiet humor. There’s also a mystery which Dolly solves through her own bravery.

Deliver Us From Normal
Charles Harrisong loves his family but hates being part of it. Growing up in Normal, Illinois feels far from normal. His family is poor and a little odd. After an ugly incident at school, Charles and his family leave Normal to live on a houseboat. This is one of the best books I’ve read in a long while. I hope you check it out.
The sequel: Far from Normal

Happy reading!

This week's free online story from Bob Brooks: Flags Fly Again

Friday, February 17, 2012

Online Read Aloud Sites: Part 1

Although the best (by far!) read alouds are with someone sitting right next to you, with you both looking at the book together, these sites give another way – online. The sites offer a variety of stories, both for young kids and older ones. Check them out and see which ones you like. My suggestion? Sit with someone else and listen together!

There are three stories read aloud in British English (classy!). Interactive so kids don't just listen. (hint: conker = hickory nut)

These read aloud Clifford stories have a cool feature: they let the reader choose some of the words to fit into the story. The words you choose affect the illustration.

This is a subscription site, but there are sample books for kids to read and listen to. If you love this site, consider a subscription. There are plenty of free books to try – new ones and classics such as Beatrix Potter.

Famous actors (James Earl Jones, Betty White…) from the Screen Actors Guild read well-known stories like Harry the Dirty and The Rainbow Fish. Very fun.

This is a somewhat unusual site. Mrs. P (the actress Kathy Kinney) introduces her stories with rather odd stories of her own. Although the stories are shown with some illustrations, a lot of what you see is Mrs. P reading in a very entertaining way. The stories are all on YouTube.

Not all the stories included in this site have audio, but some do. Just scroll down to find the stories with the speaker symbol.

I hope you enjoy these sites. Next Friday, I’ll suggest 6 more!

Wednesday, February 15, 2012

Read Alouds: Supporting Literacy One Book at a Time

For those of you who are regular readers of my blog, the following will seem rather familiar. For the most part, it is a retelling of a couple of previous posts: Tips for Encouraging Reluctant Readers  and Promoting Literacy through Picture Books: Part I 
Following my section on Read Alouds is a section about World Read Aloud Day. I hope you'll catch their enthusiasm and support the work being done by the people at LitWorld.

Read Alouds: Supporting Literacy One Book at a Time
Reading lots of books aloud is my number one tip for increasing interest in books and reading. Not just for when children are preschoolers but throughout the elementary years, or longer. Reading aloud, for as long as your child allows it, has lots of benefits:
  • gives your child the opportunity to “read” the books she wishes she could but can’t yet
  • shows that you value reading
  • conditions your child to associate reading with pleasure
  • creates background knowledge
  • builds vocabulary
You may have stopped reading to your child when he first learned to read. If so, I encourage you to start again.

The following was written initially as a promotion for picture books. Although picture books are GREAT for read-alouds, lots of other books (chapter books, biographies and other nonfiction) are great, too. The main criteria for a good read-aloud? [1] your child wants to hear it (essential) and [2] you want to read it (important but secondary to #1). So…what’s so good about read-alouds?
They are fun. Read alouds provide a pocket of time in which you move into a different world: fantasy, foolishness, humor, drama, unknown places, courage …
They are motivating. When my son was in elementary school, he was a struggling reader, so I read to him all the time. Eventually, he developed good reading skills. By then, he was eager to use them because he’d loved the stories we’d shared for so many years.
They are easier to follow.Sometimes books can be confusing if a child doesn’t have the background knowledge. The beauty of read alouds is you can stop and clarify. This can be direct, “Do you understand this part?” or indirect, “I don’t quite get this part. I’m going to read it again.” or “I’m confused. Do you get this?”
They often introduce new vocabulary and expressions. Books tend to be filled with words and expressions kids (and often adults) don’t know. This can be a real motivation-buster. When you read a book aloud, you can stop and talk about new words. Don’t know the word either? See if you and your child can figure it out from context or look it up. Or, if it doesn’t really seem to matter, just keep reading.
They introduce a variety of writing styles, authors, and illustrators. Sometimes classroom teachers don’t have the time to read a wide variety of books with their students (a sad but real situation). No problem! You can read whatever you choose :)
They provide an excuse to stay close. This is true no matter what type of book you choose. Picture books demand to be seen. And even though reading aloud a chapter book with can be done from the other side of the room, why keep that distance? Sitting close is the way to go.
They provide windows to complex subjects and ideas. Well-written books can introduce, clarify, raise questions, challenge and spark interest in all kinds of subjects: science, history, philosophy, emotions, math, attitudes, cultures …

Repeating myself: I meant it when I said being interested in a book yourself is nice but not necessary when choosing a good book to read aloud. Your child’s interest is much more important and her choices may very well expand your own interests.
When my son was little, we decided to read aloud THE WIND IN THE WILLOWS by Kenneth Grahame. Fairly quickly, I discovered that this book was not easy to read aloud. I kept wishing that my son would lose interest. No chance. However, I soon got caught up in the magic. To this day, I get a little misty thinking about how much we both loved that book.

Celebrate the Power of Words and Stories and Take Action for Global Literacy with LitWorld
March 7, 2012 is World Read Aloud Day, sponsored by LitWorld. Please read below and then check out the LitWorld website.
Worldwide, at least 793 million people remain illiterate. Imagine a world where everyone can read...
On March 7, 2012, LitWorld, a global literacy organization based in New York City, will be celebrating World Read Aloud Day. World Read Aloud Day is about taking action to show the world that the right to read and write belongs to all people. World Read Aloud Day motivates children, teens, and adults worldwide to celebrate the power of words, especially those words that are shared from one person to another, and creates a community of readers advocating for every child’s right to a safe education and access to books and technology.
By raising our voices together on this day we show the world’s children that we support their future: that they have the right to read, to write, and to share their words to change the world.
To learn more and to register to participate in World Read Aloud Day, please visit by clicking HERE

Happy reading!

Monday, February 13, 2012

Extraordinary Nonfiction by Kelly Milner Halls

I've discovered a new author, Kelly Milner Halls. Halls has been writing for years but I just hadn't known about her. She writes the most wonderful nonfiction books about all sorts of subjects: horses, dinosaurs, science fair projects, mummies…

Although the text is often fairly challenging – most books are at a middle school reading level – just the pictures and captions give a ton of information. If you find the reading is a bit too difficult, why not share the books with your parents or siblings? They are definitely worth it.

After much research and technical support (thank you Nathan Halter from Indie Bound), I have figured out how to put book links into my posts. Yay! Clicking on the cover will send you to an Indie Bound page, in case you'd like to order a book.

Here is a sampling of Kelly Milner Halls’ wonderful books.

Wild Horses
 I never knew there were so many different kinds of wild horses. This book introduces the horse family tree and includes the relatives of today's modern horse that are now extinct. It also includes the types of zebras and asses that still live in the wild.

In Search of Sasquatch
Sasquatch, also known as Bigfoot, is a cryptid – a creature of cryptozoology. Cryptozoology is the study of creatures not recognized by traditional science. Kelly Milner Halls interviews cryptozoologists, other experts, and regular people like us who have seen, heard, or maybe stumbled across evidence leading them to believe that Sasquatch is real. This book really makes you think.

Tales of the Cryptids: Mysterious Creatures That May or May Not Exist
As stated above, cryptozoology is the study of animals that may or may not be real, such as Bigfoot and the Loch Ness Monster. This book introduces the reader to cryptozoology and tells about a whole bunch of wildly interesting beings. There is a terrific dictionary at the end of the book that gives a quick description of each creature and ranks it as to whether it is real, leaning toward real, unknown, leaning toward hoax or a downright hoax.

Mysteries of the Mummy Kids 
I've read a little about mummies and have always found them to be quite interesting. But I’d never thought about mummy kids. This book explores mummies around the world and tells about famous child mummies. It describes the reasons behind mummification and explains how bodies become mummified. It’s a little creepy but fascinating.

Science Fair Projects: Forces and Motion [sorry, no link for this book]
Thinking about entering a science fair? Having trouble coming up with an idea? This book could be very helpful. It suggests some possible projects and gives step-by-step instructions as to how to set your project up. It tells you how go through the scientific process but it doesn't tell you what to expect.

Dinosaur Parade
 Although all of today’s books have lots of pictures, this is the only picture book in the bunch. It shows what it might be like to stand next to a real, live dinosaur. The illustrations show a parade of children marching alongside an array of dinosaurs, from Sauropods to Therizinosaurs. At the bottom of each page are facts about over 60 dinosaurs, including their names, when they lived, and where they were found. I know if this book had been written when my son was little, it would have been a favorite.

Dinosaur Travel Guide
Are you really into dinosaurs? If you are, this book is for you. Each state and Canadian province has its own chapter and lists all the places you can go to find stuff about dinosaurs. Included are museums, fossil collections, parks, petrified forests and paleontological societies. In the last pages you’ll find a Dinosaur Shopping Guide and a section of Dinosaur Links.

Wild Dogs: Past& Present
Every continent in the world except Antarctica has wild dogs. Wild dogs include wolves, foxes and jackals, plus others you've probably never heard of. This book follows wild dogs wherever they live, telling about their lives and struggles.

Saving the Baghdad Zoo
In 2003, Army Major William Sumner undertook a mission to save the Baghdad Zoo in Iraq, a country being torn apart by war. This book tells of the challenges of rebuilding the Baghdad Zoo after its near destruction. Due to the work of Sumner and others, the zoo has been changed into a place of peace for Iraqi families and the zoo's animals.

Albino Animals
Albino Animals
Albino animals are regular animals that have one special trait – they have no pigment. Pigment is what gives animals their color. So, without pigment, albino animals are usually white. There's something quite special about these animals. This book is full of gorgeous pictures of all kinds of albino animals - reptiles, mammals, birds and others. There's also lots of interesting information.
It’s always wonderful to discover a new author. I hope you enjoy these books as much as I did. Click here and here to visit her websites.

This Week's free online story from Bob Brooks: Signs of Spring.

Friday, February 10, 2012

50 Jokes for Valentine's Day

I may have gone a little crazy with the Valentine's jokes. There are so many of them! Some of the jokes are based on old songs. If you don’t get them, ask someone who’s older.

What did the caveman give his wife on Valentine's Day?
Ughs and kisses!

What did the boy sheep say to the girl sheep on Valentine’s Day?
I Love Ewe!

What did the stamp say to the envelope on Valentine’s Day?
I'm stuck on you!

What did the stamp say to the envelope on Valentine’s Day?
You send me!

Knock knock!
Who's there?
Frank Frank who?
Frank you for being my friend!

Knock knock!
Who's there?
Howard who?
Howard you like a big kiss?

What did the boy owl say to the girl owl on Valentine’s Day?
Owl be yours!

What do you call a very small Valentine's?
A Valentiny!

What did the boy squirrel say to the girl squirrel on Valentine's Day?
I'm nuts about you!

What did the girl squirrel say to the boy squirrel on Valentine's Day?
You're nuts so bad yourself!

Knock knock!
Who's there?
Sherwood who?
Sherwood like to be your valentine!

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Pooch who?
Pooch your arms around me, baby!

Why is lettuce the most loving vegetable?
Because it's all heart.

What is a vampire's sweetheart called?
His ghoul-friend.

Why did the banana go out with the prune?
Because it couldn't get a date.

What is a ram's favorite song?
I only have eyes for ewe, Dear

What is the difference between a girl who is sick of her boyfriend and a sailor who falls into the ocean?
One is bored over a man the other is a man overboard.

If your aunt ran off to get married, what would you call her?

Did Adam and Eve ever have a date?
No, but they had an apple.

What did the boy octopus say to the girl octopus?
I wanna hold your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand

What did the valentine card say to the stamp?
Stick with me and we'll go places!

What did the paper clip say to the magnet?
I find you very attractive.

What did the bat say to his girlfriend?
You're fun to hang around with.

What did one light bulb say to the other?
I love you a whole watt!

What did the elephant say to his girlfriend?
I love you a ton!

What did the chocolate syrup say to the ice cream?
I'm sweet on you!

What do farmers give their wives on Valentine's Day?
Hog and kisses!

Did you hear about the nearsighted porcupine?
He fell in love with a pin cushion!

What did the pencil say to the paper?
I dot my i's on you!

What did one pickle say to the other?
You mean a great dill to me.

Do skunks celebrate Valentine's Day?
Sure, they're very scent-imental!

Knock, Knock
Who's there?
Olive who?
Olive you!

What would you get if you crossed a dog with a valentine card?
A card that says, "I love you drool-ly!"

What did the painter say to her boyfriend?
"I love you with all my art!"

"Do you love me more than you love sleep?"
“ I can't answer now. It's time for my nap!"

What did the man with the broken leg say to his nurse?
"I've got a crutch on you!"

Did you hear about the romance in the tropical fish tank?
It was a case of guppy love.

What do you call two birds in love?

Why do valentines have hearts on them?
Because spleens would look pretty gross!

What is the most romantic city in England?

Did you hear the one about the phony Cupid?
He was totally bow-gus!

What happened when the man fell in love with his garden?
It made him wed his plants!

What does a carpet salesman give his wife for Valentine's Day?
Rugs and kisses!

What would you get if you crossed Cupid with a meat and vegetable dish?

Why did the kangaroo love the little Australian bear?
Because the bear had many fine koala-ties!

What did one piece of string say to the other?
"Be my valentwine!"

What did one fir tree say to the other?
"Be my valenpine!"

"I can't be your Valentine's for medical reasons."
"Yeah, you make me sick!"

What did one calculator say to the other?
"How do I love thee? Let me count the ways!"

Then there was the guy who promised his girlfriend a diamond for Valentine's Day.
So he took her to a baseball park!


I hope you make scads of people laugh with these jokes, including yourself!